”Resit, come here!”
He tripped over a stone as he walked to his employer.
”Resit, I am losing money everyday this mill is not working. We are in harvest period and people from all over the region are coming here to grind their wheat. You have to fix the mill.”
”Ali abe, I am working day and night. Unless the foundation is not fortified you will have the same issue before the harvesting season is over. I can fix it quickly but then it will not survive the winter. I must come back in the spring, early, to build it better.”
”Do what you can now, people are waiting.”
As Ali left him at the mill the last rays of the sun hit the water and quickly went down the horizon. The reflection of the red rays was Resit’s cue. Time to eat and rest. He washed his face and hands in the water and walked into the village where he was the guest of the Aga.
”Come in Resit bay, rest, eat. You’ve worked hard today.”
”Thank you Aga.”
Resit had been working on the water mill in Sirnak for three weeks. He had been delayed several weeks by uproars in Cizre, the closest big city.
”You look tired.”
”Yes, agam. I miss my family. I haven’t seen them since the spring and we are now in harvest period.”
”Soon you’ll be done here and you can go back to them.”
”I hope so agam.”
The aga of Sirnak was generous, every evening he had a feast. Burgul, bread, hummus, soup and meat came in. The leaders of the village were invited tonight. It was unusual thing. When they were invited it was usually to discuss matters and issues after the meal.
”Is it true?” one of the guests asked the Aga.
”What?”
”Is it true that a firman has been drafted?”
”I heard that not all the tribal leaders have accepted the firman” another questioned.
What is this firman, Resit wondered to himself.
The Aga held up his hand to quiet the murmur among the guests.
”Brothers, we must decide tonight which path we must take. This cannot wait until the morning. It is true what you have heard. A firman has been drafted and the decision has been sent to us. All tribes are to obey it or they will suffer the consequences. This is our opportunity to seize these lands from the Turks. If we show the government that we can do this, we can take charge of this entire region and make it ours and fulfill the longing that so many of us have and the longing of our ancestors. Anatolia belongs to us and the Ottomans have denied us our rights for too long. The entire region has been neglected by the government for decades and still they refuse to give us the right to govern it as we wish. We must pay tax to them, tax money they use for their own corruption and benefit. They don’t support us, they don’t support our infrastructure, everything is falling apart. Now is the time to stand up against the Turks. The Empire is on the brink of falling apart. Let us cut this part of the land away from them and take it for ourselves. Let not the Armenians have any of it. Let us exterminate them and expel the Turks from this region.”
The atmosphere in the rooms was thick and heavy. In the silence that followed the crackling of the fireplace echoed in Resit’s ears. He gazed at the Aga as he spoke. Exterminate the Armenians? I am a suryani. Armenians don’t concern me, Resit thought to himself. The thick silence was amplified by noise of a dozen of men chewing and hitting utensils and plates against each other. Resit lost his appetite. Armenians don’t concern me. What if they don’t stop there.
”Agam.” The Aga looked at Resit with an open mouth, food hanging from his mouth. ”Resit?” ”Agam, I don’t mean to be rude. I appreciate your hospitality and everything you have done for me, for giving me this opportunity to build this mill for you. May I ask you about this firman. Is the firman about exterminating the Armenians? What about the suryani like myself. Will you let us be?”
”Resit bay, you are a great at what you do. Without you this mill would not exist. The best mill master in this region. You build us the tool which allows us to live and prosper. For this I will always be grateful to you. For this reason I will answer your question, the decision of the firman is only concerned with the Armenians. The suryani kadim, you are our close brothers. We will protect you and not cause any harm to you unless you join the Armenians and make your cause one with theirs. I tell you all my dear friends, this is not what we want to do, but is something we have to do. For hundreds of years our forefathers have strived to get this land. Now the Turks have promised us, exterminate the Armenians and we will give this region to you to govern as you wish.”
”Agam, forgive me, may I speak?”
”Ahmed bay, how is your father. Give him my best regards it was a pity he was not able to come himself.”
”Agam, he sends his greetings and apologizes for not being able to come. His health has declined in recent years and he barely leaves the house these days. Agam, on his behalf, may I speak?”
”Please Ahmed bay, Murat is a respected chieftain in this region. If he has sent you, we receive your word as his word.”
”Thank you Agam for these kind words. I will render them to my father, he will be pleased. Agam, we received this firman several weeks ago and we have studied it thoroughly before arriving here today. It states that the Kurmanc will receive this entire region and it will become an autonomous region under the Ottoman rule and the Kurmanc will be given a place in the government in Ankara. This is not the first time the Turks promise us something like this. We have heard about the insurrection of past of the Armenians but they have never been successful. Why should we fight the dirty war of the Turks, get killed and then in the end trust the Turks to give us this portion of the land. They have a whole army, why would they not use it against the Armenians. Because we will kill them for them and they will subjugate us after we have done their work.”
”Ahmed bay, Agam bay,” a thin and fragile man stood up to speak. His mustasch was big and white and yellow from smoking too many cigarettes. ”I remember sitting in this exact room when your father, blessed in memory, was still with us. This was during the insurrection of 1886, thirty years ago. Again, the Ottoman asked for our help and we sat here and spoke of the opportunity. We followed the order of the firman both because we were afraid of what would happen to us if we did not and also because we saw an opportunity to again seize these lands and get autonomy. We delivered, the Turks did not. They gave us something, but far from the autonomy that we are seeking or that we had expected. We are still subjugated to the Turks, and for what? We attacked our neighbors and friends. You may say, this is the way of the world, some people conquer and some are conquered. We are conquered by the Turks and we conquer the Armenians. The cycle of death. Even if we were to comply with the firman and we go on and exterminate the Armenians, we kill their men and take their daughters and wives as wives for ourselves and our sons. Then what? How can we build a nation on blood. Like you, we were young. Like you we were fierce and only thought of what could be. We felt the taste of blood on our tongue and we were hungry for more. With age comes wisdom and the ability to see through the lies of the Ottomans and an understanding of what killing does not only to the one you kill, but also to the killer. It haunts you and makes you harsh. At nights until this day I still dream of the women that were raped and the young boys we killed.”
”Agam, my brothers.” ”Mehmet bay, please, let your voice be heard.”
”The great teacher Mawlana Rumi writes that we fight a fierce war within, what is the point of fighting with others? We fight with others to gain more power. We gain land, we gain control. We will perhaps be given control form the Turks if we do their bidding. But it is still they who are in control unless we take it from them. But even if we fight wars with others, to what end? We should fight with ourselves, to gain control and mastery of our own thoughts and desires. Rumis’ teacher Shams Tabrizi has taught us sufis that hell and heaven are not in the future. Hell and heaven are now. When we love each other selflessly, then it is real heaven and when we are at war with each other we are in the real hell. Agam, brothers, we cannot think that we will kill, wage war, gain control and then create peace. Peace must begin from love.”
”Religious garbage. Did your Mawlana and Shams fight the wars of the past? Did they help us gain control. What about if the Turks come here with their army. Will this love save us then? Or do you suggest that we sing and dance until the Turks leave us be?”
”We have all heard about the greatness of Abdul Ghaffar Khan, the Sufi muslim leader in India who adopted the way of peace. The greatest weapon of the Prophet is patience and righteousness. No power on earth can stand against it. Tell me, brother, when we stand at the door of God what is the difference between Moslem and Christian whether they are sinners or righteous? At his door all are seekers and he is the sought. When you kill somebody, you kill yourself first. This is not the path we should take.”
”Dear chieftains, let’s retreat to the other room and continue the conversation.” The conversation was broken up by some servants coming into the room cleaning up the table. The aga came up to Resit. ”Resit bay, I think it’s time for you to retreat to your room. I would like a word privately with the chieftains. But you have my word, there is nothing to worry about for you and your family. The firman is about the Armenians.”
”Agam, thank you, but I am scared that once you start attacking the Armenians you will also kill the suryani. How do you differentiate between them? We are married with each other, we give our women to their men and they their women to our men to marry. There is not one suryani family who is not also related to an Armenian.”
The Aga’s forehead creased and his jaw clenched as he took a deep breath. ”Look Resit, you are a guest in my house and I will treat you with respect. You are of great value to me and to this region. Send for your wife and your kids to come here and you will have my protection.” ”Agam, when will all this take place? When will the firman start. Let me get a chance to go back to my wife and children and run away before it all happens.” ”Resit bay, I cannot tell you this, but I will honor your wish to go to your family. If you choose to come back here, you still have my protection. This house is your house.”
The Aga was the last one to go into the other room. He saw smoke of cigarettes rising from the other room, the room lighting up each time the cigarettes were inhaled. ”Resit, go, go and warn your family.” The Aga turned and went into the room and closed the door. Resit fell down to the floor, trying to gather himself. Zayno, Yaqub, Brahim… He struggled to get up, took a deep breath and went to his room. He packed his belongings, took some water and walked to his donkey. He dropped some water on the way. He packed lightly so that the donkey could walk quickly. The journey from Sirnak to Kerburan was fourteen hours long without stopping. Tomorrow evening he would be with his family. What if the firman had already been adopted in the Mardin region? What if they already had attacked the village? The thoughts were tormenting him. The journey in the middle of the night was arduous. He had to choose the quickest road through the mountains. It was riddled with bandits that were looking for people to loot. He had to take the risk, taking that road meant avoiding people asking questions.
The village was pitch dark, some torches lighting up some of the dirt roads. He headed towards the mountain after exiting the village. Nobody asked anything, he had the aga’s blessing to leave.